Years ago, I was asked out by a "friend" who got miffed when I declined. See, she'd forgotten that I had just started dating the woman who would become the love of my life. I was completely un-interested in anyone else. It's an understandable lapse in that the woman I was seeing lived in the next state and we didn't go out much when we saw each other (if you get my drift), so she mostly saw me by myself. (This was in the days of going to something every single night of the week. Drinks on Tuesday? Sure! Nachos on Thursday? Just tell me where!) Regardless, she got pissy about my not taking her up on her "offer", got drunk one night and made the mistake of saying that she thought I was asexual.
Pissed me off.
See... I'm not one of those who "advertises"... if you get my drift. No, I believe (firmly) in being an absolute lady... on the streets. As for the "sheets" well, that's only YOUR business if you're in them with me. And, I don't like people speculating about me like she did.
Some folks just have to be taught a lesson about gossiping and wild speculations, doncha think?
This "friend" of mine adored the perfume I wore at the time and occasionally she would wear something I liked, so it had become something of a teasing ritual to lean in and do a quick sniff. Especially when one of us bought something new. We'd lean in, breathe in and (typically) nod, smile and compliment each other.
Unbeknownst to her, I'd already heard about her faux pas via the grapevine the next time I saw her. When I saw her again, I wasn't sure if I would say something to her about it or not. Not knowing that I knew what I knew (you know?), she acted as if everything were fine. She came up to me in the club, gave me a hug and the usual compliment on my perfume. Coincidentally, she'd bought something new and offered her neck up for a smell.
I stepped forward,
into her space,
took my nose,
placed it at the base of her neck,
druuuugggg it up to her ear
in my sexiest,
"Ahhhh, damn... you smell sooooo... mmmm.... good..."
She just stood there, rooted to the spot... long after I had walked away.